Caity Weaver on TGI Friday’s

“Earlier I said these mozzarella sticks taste like garbage. I would like to amend that statement. They taste worse than garbage. I would prefer to eat garbage, because then there would be the chance I would get to eat a bite of something good someone started to eat but couldn’t finish, or paper.

The water outside TGI Friday’s is black now.”

Caity Weaver’s 6,000 word account of a day spent at TGI Friday’s is an effort in clickbait worthy of Dickens.

Helen Rosner on Chicken Tenders

“Instagram means that once-private pleasures can be even more pleasurable when they’re broadcast to an audience of thousands. I may love the garlic scape pesto I whizzed up at home yesterday, or the peppery buttermilk panna cotta at Blackberry Farm in Tennessee, but more than that, I love broadcasting that love, a narcotic combination of “but it’s my job” rationalization and the validating thrill of a push notification. Every picture of food is a selfie.”

– Helen Rosner

Click here for the rest of her astonishing essay about chicken tenders.

Jonathan Gold on The Bubble

“The first responsibility of any great restaurant is to keep you in the bubble, the soft-serve cocoon of illusion where you forget the world exists for anything but your pleasure. And the newly redesigned Spago, from the moment you toss your keys to the valet to the moment you stagger back out again, gives good bubble.”

– Jonathan Gold

Click here for the rest of his review.